A Question

What moves me?

Or, more precisely, what gets me up in the morning?  It's a question posed to me through a friend and it's a very good one.  It got me thinking about why I'm doing what I'm doing ... and what motivated me in the past.

For the first five years of my life, I am sure it was merely basic desires.  My body's desire to eat, sleep, drink, play and ... well, you get the idea.  The basic curiosity of a small child to EXPLORE and SEE and TOUCH and DO.  

For the next ten years, my motivation was the desire to please.  To be a "good girl", a "good friend", a "good person".  My whole world was devoted to the purpose of pleasing my parents, family, friends, and teachers. 

My years in high school and the first two years at college were spent focusing on school.  The desire to "accomplish" and to be known for these achievements.  In the whole of my college career, I received only one B - the flaw in my academic record, or so it would seem.  

But in the last two years my goals have ... changed.

What gets me up in the morning?

I still have that drive to ACCOMPLISH.  But what gets me up in the morning these days is the same thing that drove me to travel 4,000 miles from home to live in a foreign country, away from family and friends.  I crave the experience.  I am no longer satisfied to simply hear about the rest of the world and it's mysteries - I refuse to be paralyzed by the fear of 'what if'.  I want to feel the Spanish sun on my face, to wade in the Mediterranean, to walk through cities that existed before the birth of Christ.  And I want to be able to share the story of my life with my grandchildren one day, and tell them 'this is what I did.  This is how I lived.  I was terrified - but I did it.'

I was terrified, but I did it.  

THAT is why I get up each and every morning.

To DO it.